By: Adnan Ali Chishti
We experience many relationships in our lives like father, mother, siblings, uncle and aunt. However, given the divine nature and sacredness of the relation called “Friendship”, it is often insisted that “Poor is he, who does not have friends.” Or “Happiest are the couples that are good friends first then spouses.” Researchers suggest that the happy couples are more likely to live 10% longer, and become richer than those unhappy.
Keeping in view such significance, International Day of Friendship is celebrated on July 30 every year. The day promotes the role of friendship to spread love, peace and harmony, reconciliation, solidarity, mutual understanding and togetherness all over the world.
In order to comprehend the varying levels of friendship, one needs to understand “The Social Penetration Syndrome” of human psychological behavior. It proposes that, as relationships develop, interpersonal communication moves from relatively shallow, non-intimate phases to deeper, more intimate ones.
Nonetheless, the fast changing world has subsequently brought multiple challenges in the face of friendship; costing not just its growth, but also its survival.
Strengthening the bond via latest trends
With the advent of social media, including Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram, Whats App, Snapchat and etc.; it is now much easier to stay connected to friends like never before.
I remember getting hocked by a post on Facebook, which said: To remind your friend of your thoughts for him or her, go over the timeline and start liking, commenting and sharing posts. This could be used as a tool to bring round the upset friends as well. Always Remember: what goes around, comes around! And you may start bracing the same from your friends soon.
Many a times; things, places, and scenes around you, strike a reminder of your certain friends. In such situations, it is advisable to take a picture or record a video and share on social media tagging those certain friends unless it is offensive.
We all have fond memories from our past and many of us log those memories to maintain a careful record of them. You may, from time-to-time, share some snaps from those memories on social media and kick start a chain of conversation off it.
Points to Ponder:
Seeking attention from friends is a challenging task these days, for which, following steps may be of great help:
- Twitting @ your friends’ Twitter account or re tweeting tweets of them.
- Congratulating your friends on their work anniversary on LinkedIn.
- Instead of writing Birthday Wish on friends’ timeline, sending a private greeting message may work out very well.
- Sending in greeting messages on special festivals like Eid, Diwali, Christmas and etc.
- Writing such topics or things on the timeline of friends which they are interested in like movies, sports, celebrities, fashion and etc.
- Always seeking advice from your friends on certain issues pertaining to career, decision making, job seeking, changing jobs, and etc. and discuss their life experiences regarding those issues. This will make your friends feel special about themselves. Remember, two heads are better than alone. You may end up getting an advice which may prove fruitful in future.
- With the help of Whats App you can create a group of your school friends, college or university fellows, or office colleagues and share some attractive stuff with them.
Things to avoid
- Refrain from tagging your friends in posts which they are not in. This is perhaps the most hated offense on Facebook of all times.
- Avoid marking your friends in tweets that are not interested in.
- Never taking up unwanted habits from your friends’ childhood time especially in group chats or discussions.
- Beware of sending messages or friend requests to the family members of your friends as some people do not approve of it.
- It is advisable to always stay conscious of the religious, political, social affiliations and values deeply adhered to by your friends. For you may leave a comment, tweet or reaction to their tweets/posts that may prompt them either to unfollow you or unfriend you without your knowledge. And you might lose an old time good friend.
- Avoid making fun of or cutting jokes on the statues of your friends which as marked as feeling annoyed, angry, sick or upset as this could lead them to respond aggressively, needlessly escalating the issue out of proportion.
Friends often remember one another on special occasions. However hard you may try to attend marriage or any happy occasion, it is rather important to leave no stone unturned to attend the death or funeral of the loved ones of your friends, since it is the time when a friend needs a friend more than ever. Remember, a friend in need is a friend indeed.