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Nadia Jamil shaves her head post-chemotherapy

SAMAA | - Posted: May 23, 2020 | Last Updated: 6 days ago
SAMAA |
Posted: May 23, 2020 | Last Updated: 6 days ago
Nadia Jamil shaves her head post-chemotherapy

Photo: Instagram/@njlahori

Actor Nadia Jamil shaved her head post-chemotherapy and prayed to be stronger for her kids and end her relationship with loneliness.

She shared that her hair had been falling in big clumps despite the ice cap. “The centre had practically gone. I was left w the front & a little on the sides. It was petrifying,” said Jamil.

“That night I washed & conditioned it sobbing, w rose smelling shampoo. I knew this was goodbye 2 a part of myself I had hid behind 4 years. My hair, like many of us ,had been my vanity, the face I wanted 2 show the outside world. If it wasn’t looking good I felt nervous, bad about myself. & now it was gone. And I have to admit it was an ugly death. That night I laughed & cried w the woman in the mirror.”

She recalled all the prayers she made before going ahead for the biggest change in her life.

“Honestly that night, I never prayed 4 my hair. Or even my vanity 2be protected. I prayed that I love the woman who emerges from under it. I have never loved her..myself…as I should,” said Jamil.

“I prayed I learn how 2 self parent & become a better adult while retaining the love, spontaneity & fun I have in my heart. I prayed I learn 2 put myself first so I can take care of myself & others w empathy. If I am a mess, I am useless 2 those I love. I prayed 4 strategies 2 end my relationship w loneliness & fear,that stems from child abuse & I prayed 4 my creativity 2 be blessed.”

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The night of Laylatulqadr I was reading Surah Yousaf & the words Fasabirun Jamil stayed w me from an ayat of the Surah. Not just patience..but a patience of deep beauty. My hair had been falling in huge clumps regardless of the ice cap. The centre had practically gone. I was left w the front & a little on the sides. It was petrifying. That night I washed & conditioned it sobbing, w rose smelling shampoo. I knew this was goodbye 2 a part of my self I had hid behind 4 years. My hair, like many of us,had been my vanity, the face I wanted 2 show the outside world. If it wasn’t looking good I felt nervous,bad about myself. & now it was gone. And I have to admit it was an ugly death. That night I laughed & cried w the woman in the mirror. She looked quite crazy. I looked like an electrified laama. Wayne’s World meets Malang Baba. Honestly that night, I never prayed 4 my hair. Or even my vanity 2be protected. I prayed that I love the woman who emerges from under it. I have never loved her..myself…as I should. I prayed 4 my strength of character. I prayed I fulfill my responsibilities 2 my son’s,especially my foster sons, 2 the other children who i know will come in2 my life & 2 my best friends …my son’s Rakae & Mir. I prayed I learn how 2 self parent & become a better adult while retaining the love, spontaneity & fun I have in my heart. I prayed I learn 2 put myself first so I can take care of myself & others w empathy. If I am a mess, I am useless 2 those I love. I prayed 4 strategies 2 end my relationship w loneliness & fear,that stems from child abuse. & I prayed 4 my creativity 2 be blessed. I saw my weaknesses,they must be worked on by me & recognised my strengths,they will be appreciated by me. I closed my eyes & smiled at the love I am surrounded w. It will never again not be enough. It is. I prayed & mediated deep in2 the night. The morning after Laylatulqadr a kind gentleman called Rob came & clipped my hair. What was left Chotu,Ami & I tried 2 shave off,leaving nicks,bloody cuts & my beautifully shaped head. I looked at my eyes, my smile. This is Nadia Jamil. I held her hand & we marched off 4 #chemotherapy That is another story. I❤️U

A post shared by Nadia Jamil (@njlahori) on May 22, 2020 at 6:10pm PDT

In another post, she shared a video and thanked her doctors. “A huge thank you to the team at #Addenbrooks#hematology who didn’t just clean my pic line, feed me toffee pudding and give me my chemo, they also knew how to use a razor so helped tidy the patchy mess on my head,” reads the post.

View this post on Instagram

A huge thank you to the team at #Addenbrooks #hematology who didn’t just clean my pic line, feed me toffee pudding and give me my chemo, they also knew how to use a razor so helped tidy the patchy mess on my head The #NHS #mentalhealthcrises team have also been fantastic. They saved my life at a time I was in a really dark place. They simply didn’t give up on me. They are such #CHAMPIONS DR Luke Davies, Dr Farouhi, Sharon Saunders, Charlotte, Matt, Raquel, Marta, Dave, Yuki… Talking to them is simply a joy…they are so loving and healing. Then there have been those from home and away. Video calls every single day … Long intense loving messages. Thank you. It’s not been easy but you make it easier. Most of the time my phone is closed so the messages have been going to Mas phone. She reads them out to me and makes my day! Sometimes I come here and read the strength you all give me. Thank you! #igetbywithalittlehelpfrommyfriends

A post shared by Nadia Jamil (@njlahori) on May 22, 2020 at 7:38pm PDT

In her latest post, Jamil said that she likes her new self. “I like the new me… Surviving the pain is such a victory … Every day is a victory …I know tomorrow will be awful with nausea and fatigue…but then there will be another victory,” said she. “Sometimes something small like finishing a meal or having water is a victory.”

View this post on Instagram

I like the new me… Surviving the pain is such a victory … Every day is a victory …I know tomorrow will be awful with the nausea and fatigue…but then there will be another victory. Sometimes something small like finishing a meal or having water is a victory. Watching films with Ami victory Chilling w Chotu Victory A message from Rakae full of love and tenderness …victory My family…dog… friends…the love I feel that nothing can kill.. my victory. Wanting to get up to fight the fight and love and learn how to love better…victory. Every time I write to all of you and hear from all of you…a huge victory. Nico will snuggle me throughout this victory… InshaAllah And here I am. Still your Nado. Slightly stronger More vunerable. No blow dried tresses to hide behind. Climbing out of hurt and dark and learning how to live life in simpler, clearer, ways. Starting with herself. Self Parenting. A new word I learned and liked. Chalo ye bhi ho Jaye 🙂 #friendship #healing #strength #sunshine #journey #cancer #bald #hair #rebirth

A post shared by Nadia Jamil (@njlahori) on May 22, 2020 at 7:58pm PDT

Earlier in May, she had her first chemotherapy session. Back in April, the actor told fans that she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She is currently in the UK for treatment.

Taking to Instagram, Jamil said that she was gathering strength. “There has been devastating sadness and incredible love accompanying me since my diagnosis. Every day I face my weaknesses and my strengths. Every day I learn to embrace that gratitude that defined me for so long,” she said.

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